Monday, May 19, 2008

Elizabeth Caputo: Trying To Make Sense




Recent Hints

I wish direct communication were possible. But I don't have her number. And I can't go to her events. But I don't feel a sense of closure either. There are still hints here and there. Her attitude has always been, it happens during face time or not.

Justin Krebs showed up on his own at the Al Franken event. I have a feeling that might have been a response to this: Caputo: Closure? He must be like, wait a minute, I might have acted a little bit of an asshole on day one for two seconds, but I was there. Something did happen.

Months and months after day one, I am at Rudy's, and a Brooklyn woman gets drunk and throws herself on a Manhattan Kombiz, and Justin and friends have to escort her to a cab outside. He comes back, and shares the story, and looks at me puzzled. Why did a fancy banker, Upper West Side, Manhattan woman throw herself at you on day one? Who are you? Where are you from? He looked genuinely puzzled. And she was not even drunk.

Well, Justin, what happened was Brooke Ellison happened. She saw me talk to Brooke Ellison, and she fell for me. Brooke Ellison happened to her, black guy running for Governor happened to me.

Ben was there at the Chinatown party: Drinking Liberally, 2nd Annual Fundraiser, Chinatown. He is like, how about a brunch for a first date? Sex happens on the second date. He was talking of elephants and horses and an Indian wedding ceremony he recently went to. "There was no elephant." That felt surreal to me. Was that his response to my coffee talk?

At the Washington governor event at Opal, a venue suggested by me at my blog long months back at the Rangel event, she placed three strikes on me: Carolyn, Jennifer and the Bombay Palace woman. I placed one strike on her at the Planned Parenthood event. The blog entry for that day has been a major marker in time. Caputo before and after. She kept throwing hints. The Bombay Palace woman was a hint, the one who said "The event has not started yet." Jennifer was strategically planted on the street around 6 PM of the Arianna event.

Finally I have apologized for my bad conduct on February 7. And it has been a week. How do you know if the apology worked or not?

So you threw the hint at the Bombay Palace event, and the Arianna event, and I got it, and I apologized.

Closure

Is it possible that it is over before it began? I have been seeking relationship advice from some random, and some not so random people. One was, do you know if she is not married, does she have a ring? Another was, it is possible she found someone else in the mean time. A third was, an average date in NYC lasts two months. Yet another was, people in Manhattan are fully career oriented, there is no time for love. One was, just drop it. Another: if you really like her, never say never, never give up, keep trying.

She was single on day one. She was single at that summer bash where I got a "China and Africa" message. She was single at the Holiday party. She was single on February 7. She was single at the Bombay Palace event. The venue was a response to my calling her queen. She was single at the Arianna event, or she would not have planted Jennifer on the street, and the white guy at th door. That was her caring too much for me. It is possible she found someone else after the Arianna event, entirely possible. But how likely is that? But I am happy for anyone who can find love, like Bruce Willis once said. The founding fathers might have also said it.

Some Scenarios

Did I come too strong? Did I go too far with my poetry? I'd like to believe not. I wanted to make it absolutely clear that I liked her, and to the extent I did.

Was the president talk something outlandish? I have thought of that some times. Of all the biggies I have come to know in the Manhattan political circles - Lewis Cohen, Tracey Denton, Kristina Hoke, Justin Krebs, Dave Pollak - Caputo is the only one who has come across to me as someone who could some day run for major office. I have a feeling the rest are not even going to run, like never. That is my political observation. That is not a potential relationship observation. Actually I have been so detailed with my president talk for her, that if we were to go out, I would ask her point blank, tell me without thinking about it at all, tell me, do you see yourself running for office down the line? If she says no, I'd be like, drop it. I will not bring this up again.

But work and career have to be talked about. Months and months back when she was like, you are a blogger, and that is enough, I am like, no, I want you to take interest in the cutting edge work I have been doing for Nepal, and the big tech plans I have. My idea of unconditional love is not that you get to suggest I am some kind of a career loser, and that is still okay. I will go pound to pound with you on the money: I just need a few years.

At the Texas debate watch party, when she said "you are delusional," that so pissed me off. I thought she was disrespecting my dreams, and was suggesting it was outlandish of me to write she was going to be president some day. At the spy event she made it clear she was not referring to my dreams, but rather to my reaction to the mandatory coat check at the Holiday party. That little gesture on her part opened up the poetry floodgates.

The Bombay Palace event was a slap in my face. The Planned Parenthood event was supposed to be that big day when we talked and hooked up. But you turned it into such an anticlimax. Now take this. I will build you up, and then I will have you thrown out. We are even now.

I don't feel like I came too strong. She is an intense, aggressive woman herself. Did I talk outlandish career talk? That talk can not have harmed things. She is the one who tried to get her picture taken with that young Pakistani girl. As for my company, I am talking big. I came to NYC for this company. You don't have to run for president if you don't want to, but I am not about to start talking small about my young company.

February 7

I messed up on February 7. Me talking suggestive about her Hispanic dude friend was a major gender trigger to her. But I hope that helps her understand my triggers: the KY/IN trigger on day one, the don't-touch-me trigger which actually was an I-am-going-to-become-Condi threat, and the mandatory coat check trigger.

Dinner

Ms. Caputo, how about dinner?

Earthen Oven (Indian)
53 West 72 St
(at Columbus Ave)
New York, NY 10023
Ph: 212-579-8888
Hours:
Lunch11:30 AM - 3:00 PM
Dinner5:00 PM - 11:00 PM

People, Computers

She is amazing at 5.0. (Web 5.0: Face Time) People are to her what computers and the internet are to me. If I were to get together with her, I would get super active with DL21C. I would seek a fresh start, clean slate with every DL21C person who pissed me off, and who I have pissed off. But they will have to understand I have not been in a very social phase of my life the past few years. I was doing cutting edge work in the 2.0 environment. I don't apologize for the work I did: Nobel Peace Prize 2008: Making A Case For Nepal (2). I had time and space to date her, but not any social space to get active with the DL21C, or get to know the people around her. Now I am eager to become a people person. It is not bye bye 2.0, it is more like, there is no 2.0 without 5.0.

Yellow Roses, Apology Card

Those were delivered, thanks to Arianna. But that was over a week ago. Am I to send another batch of flowers? Flowers feel good.

This Is Not A Crush, And I Am No Stalker

We have never formally hooked up, but we have been exploring since day one.

Tracey Denton, Al Benninghoff
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Gender Talk: Coming At It From The Future
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Nobel Peace Prize 2008: Making A Case For Nepal (2)
Sexism Bothers Me Directly
How to Tame a Free Spirit
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Some Reflections: Three Years In NYC
In Anticipation
Political Sci-Fi
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Pained Spitzer Inflicts Pain On His Family
Pledge Of Allegiance
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Mother
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Barack, "He Walks Between Worlds"
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On November 7: In Harlem: For Obama
Democratic Vision For The 21st Century
Switching To Obama
"First Nancy Pelosi, Then Hillary"
Seaport Diwali
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